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- My School Reports - Here's what some of my teachers said about me during my time at school, and in return here's what I say in reply to their comments. The school reports date from 1974 to 1985. If you want to see some of my old school art homework feel free to look at my Picture Gallery. This page first posted 1999. Mildly updated Sunday 4th May 2014. |
- Barton Junior School - |
Year | Teacher | Teacher's comments | My own comments |
1974 | Mrs Hiorns | Reads very well and enjoys writing stories. His writing is original and interesting. He enjoys practical subjects and has produced some good paintings. Timothy is a quiet, sensible and helpful boy in class. He works well on his own or in a group and is keen to do well. | I remember enjoying lessons very much at that time. Mrs Hiorns was a nice lady who taught well. She left the school in the same year this was written. I hope she's had as good a life as she deserved. |
1975 | Mrs Murray | Timothy is a really delightful child to have in a class. He works hard and well. | And I'm still delightful to this day. Mrs Murray left the school in the same year this was written. |
1976 | Mr Chaundy | He has
imagination and uses it thoughtfully. Always displays an intelligent interest and
has a good background of general knowledge. One could not wish for a better pupil. His behaviour and attitude to work is always excellent. |
A thoroughly intelligent man who taught me how to draw better than I had before. He was a good credit to the teaching profession and it was a sad day when he retired, shortly after he wrote my report. |
- Bayswater Middle School - Bayswater's school reports were such that any teacher could see what all the other teachers had written previously to them so this could make for interesting moments such as when one teacher put 'Not very enthusiastic' followed by the next teacher who put 'Very enthusiastic this year'. I always preferred art over needlework anyway as will become obvious when you read my comments below. These are only some of the teachers' comments made over three years. |
Year | Teacher | Teacher's comments | My own comments |
1977 | Mrs Cox Subject: Art |
Tries Hard but can be lazy. | You can tell I wasn't overly fond of moving to Bayswater. I did not like the splitting of pupils into contrived classes based on alleged ability. I was in the "top" set but I wanted to be in the next one down as I felt I would have fitted in better there. I also did not believe in homework. |
1978 | Mrs Cox Subject: Art |
Timothy has improved a lot. Shows more interest. | I warmed to Mrs Cox during this year and finally started to learn from her. |
Late 1978 | Mrs Cox Subject: Art |
Very enthusiastic this year. I am pleased with his work. | So was I my dear, so was I. |
1977 | Mrs Blunt Subject: Needlework
Right: 2 pictures of a rodent that I positively loathed the sight of. Ah, happy times. |
Careful work but
so slow.
|
It took me 1 and a
half years to produce a 3 inch long pin cushion in the shape of a mouse. I'd like to think
this is a record of some kind, and I'm proud of it. It took me another year to produce a Christmas card. Yes, I only did two things in 3 years of Needlework. I hated the subject, I can't think of anything worse I have ever been subjected to. I had to pay for these things too which doubly added to the insult. As for the mouse, it still exists to this day and is as unloved now as it ever was. I had wanted to destroy it when I took it back home in 1978 but my mother wanted to have it so I reluctantly handed it over. I assumed it had then been (wisely) thrown out by my mother many years ago but during 2013 I re-discovered it hiding in one her trinket boxes that had lain undisturbed in a window sill long after she'd passed away. Learning from the mistake of letting my mother know the mouse existed the Christmas card was destroyed & binned by me within a minute of entering my house in 1979, without anyone there ever knowing it had existed: it wasn't a moment too soon. Good bloody riddance. |
1978 | Mrs Blunt Subject: Needlework |
Does not find this easy. | You said it babe. |
Late 1978 | Mrs Blunt Subject: Needlework |
Not very enthusiastic. | *Snigger* |
Late 1978 | Mrs Blunt Subject: Maths |
Timothy is a conscientious worker always giving his best. | Bit of a contrast to your Needlework lessons, huh? |
1979 | Mrs Blunt Subject: Maths |
His overall score must not discourage him, it was a difficult test. | Yes, why did you make it so darned difficult? |
1978 | Mr Landers Subject: Woodwork |
Timothy always tries. | That's all he put !!!!!!! That says it all !!!!! |
1978 | Miss Lewis Subject: Music |
Timothy has come to the fore and worked very well. | I started to really get into writing music at that time and I loved singing. I joined the school choir the year before and it was a very happy experience. |
1979 | Miss Lewis Subject: Music |
A pity he doesn't play an instrument. | I know, I know. Update 4th May 2014: I still don't play an instrument. |
- Cheney Upper School - |
Year | Teacher | Teacher's comments | My own comments |
1980 | Mr Russell Subject: History |
His marks for work in class have continued to be rather disappointing. | The lessons continued to be rather disappointing as well. |
1980 | Mr Baker Subject: Geography |
His exam and test results have been below average. | It'd be a boring world if we were all interested in Geography. |
1980 | Mr Ramage Subject: Woodwork |
Needs to pay a little more attention to detail. | They were lumps of wood. How attentive does one need to be? |
1983 | Mr Ramage Subject: Maths (Money Management) |
Exam: 22% I had expected a better exam result - his difficulty is with the comprehension of the questions. |
Maths lessons that used imperial measurements were insane in the decimal age. Questions that, like a lot of old maths, were more suited to Mensa entrance exams than the testing of the ability of pupils to be able to work out problems. |
1980 | Mr Plewitt Subject: Engineering |
Tried hard but progress was slow. | That's okay, I expect you couldn't do everything either: if you could build bridges would you be teaching in school? |
1981 | Mrs Berry Subject: English |
He seems to respond in a thoughtful way to what he reads. | I was certainly
thoughtful when I ended up with a copy of Brave New World to study in
my own time when the rest of the
class got Lord Of The Flies to study. I thought: "Should I tell
her?" I didn't tell her as I was in no way interested in reading Lord Of The Flies. She was a bit surprised when I told her six weeks later. |
1981 | Mrs Spencer Form Tutor |
Tim is a stalwart of the tutor group, quiet, unassuming, ever prepared to help where he can, with no complaint. | This is just a gratuitous entry aimed at being completely immodest. |
1981 | Mr Knight Subject: French |
He must not be de-moralised by poor results. | Had I been
celebrating I suspect this would not have gone down well either. It was only French
anyway. By the way, for all those who did not listen to me at the time, I DID NOT WANT TO BE IN THE TOP SET FOR FRENCH!!! There, that's better. |
1981 | Mr Desmond Subject: Economics |
Tim produced a disappointing exam result (31%). | I didn't lose sleep over it. |
1982 | Mr Desmond Subject: Economics |
Tim produced a slightly disappointing exam result (30%). | He's less disappointed this time even though the result is actually lower. I'm not sure which financial policy covers this kind of result (what do you expect from somebody who gets 30%?) |
Feb 1984 | Mr Desmond Subject: Economics |
He must...read more widely in the subject. | Sorry to disappoint you Mr D but Economics is boring and people only take it up because it's easy to pass. We sure as Hell don't want to read any more about it !!!!! |
July 1984 | Mr Desmond Subject: Economics |
Providing he puts in the effort he should achieve an 'A' Level next year. | And in fact that's
all I did achieve, 'an' 'A' Level. One thing I should credit Mr Desmond with is that he, above all others, made me understand the need, in essays, for an introduction, reasoned arguments / thoughts and then a conclusion. |
1984 | Mr Hudson Subject: European History |
Exam: 14% | A new height in lowness. Another proud achievement. |
1981 | Mr Bishop Subject: Physics |
Exam: 32%. He will have to do better than this. | Yes, but did you see how well I did in History? |
1980 | Mr Hulford Subject: Maths |
Some concepts take a little time to sink in, but once they have they stick. | Except the concept of exams. The questions in the papers always came across as being trick questions that did not test your knowledge of maths as much as your Sherlock Holmes ability to work out what the funt they were talking about. |
1981 | Mr Hulford Subject: Maths |
A good examination result which could quite easily have been even better. | Or: if he'd actually revised he might have got a better result!!! |
1983 | Mr Hulford Subject: Maths |
Exam: 92%, Group
average 41% He has little difficulty with any of the material. |
It just seemed that one day all maths finally made sense to me and I even dared to enjoy it. |
1982 | Miss Harvey Subject: English |
His examination result was very disappointing and I'm sure he can do better than this. | It was those low cut tops you wore which completely demolished my concentration. By the way, thanks for wearing those low cut tops. |
1982 | Mrs Harding Subject: Art |
He...is producing work of a high standard. | So
imagine my disappointment when it was all thrown out (along with a lot of
other peoples' efforts). Cheney used to have a Form Points system as a reward for producing good work. It went towards your tutor form total and the class who got the most were let out early on last day of term. I received only two Form Points in two years whilst other goody goody two shoes were handed them like Smarties. Mrs Harding gave me a Form Point for the last piece of homework I ever produced for her. The Form Point was given to me on my last school day prior to the summer holidays: giving it to me then was about as pointless as a broken pencil. I kept it with my homework books which were the only pieces of art I was able to rescue from the scrap heap. The picture the form point relates to can be seen on my Picture Gallery page under the title Person. |
1983 | Mr Spencer Subject: Design Graphics |
Timothy has shown fine interest in this subject and I am pleased with his work. | At the time I did not see Graphic Design as 'real' art. I can't honestly say I liked the subject at the time: I've grown to like designing a lot since leaving school. |
1983 | Mr Soper: Subject: Computer Programming |
I am very pleased with the effort...and with his work and progress. | I've come a long way with computers since then. So have computers. |
Feb 1984 | Miss Ogden Subject: British History |
He obviously researches with commendable thoroughness. |
You've got me mixed up with somebody else
surely?! This is me we're
talking about??? Never. I don't remember that at all. Not for any
subject!!!!! Definitely never history!!!! Naturally everybody called Miss Ogden 'Hilda' behind her back. A nice lady though, who thoroughly revelled in History. She'll always be remembered. |
July 1984 | Miss Ogden Subject: British History |
He is...always first to hand in his essay. | That's because I didn't spend much time writing them. And my essays were much shorter than anybody else's. And I didn't really tackle the subject. And I was bored by it. |
1984 | Mr Hudson Subject: European History |
Exam: 14% | It was only History. |
1985 | Mr John Subject: European History |
Performance is hampered by...a deficient style. | I love this comment: nobody's called me deficient before (or since). |
1985 | Mr Betton Subject: Physical Education |
He is a most quiet and helpful young man. | A very good report considering I hadn't been to any of his lessons all year. Cheers Mr Betton. |
1985 | Mr Russell Deputy Year Tutor |
I am sure that Tim has benefited from his 'A' Level course. | Yes. I've worked in the Civil Service ever since. |
And Finally: | |||
1981 | Miss Smith Subject: Latin |
Test Result: 1 out
of 140 This will have to be entered in my mark book as "0". Have you done ANY work on this at all, Timothy? I have never marked a piece of work, like this. |
I'd never produced a piece of work like this either!!! This was a first for
both of us!!! Quite gratifyingly my all-time proudest moment. Miss Smith was an excellent teacher, I simply didn't bother learning anything. To quote Ornshaw from my favourite film "Melody": "I couldn't speak to a dead Roman even if I knew the bloody lingo!!!" I enjoyed the lessons though. On the left is a scan of my answer paper to the test which took place on Tuesday 3rd November 1981. It was the last test I sat for Latin. Click on the picture to see it at a larger size. I only wish I had the question paper too. |